Tuesday 25 August 2009

Day 2 Phone/Email Game

If you're texting her to set it up. Try a choice between two positives:

Would you like to meet me on Wednesday at 8 or Thursday at 6?

or use the decoy effect:

Would you like to meet me on Wednesday at 8, Thursday at 6 or Sunday for Church.

On the phone, always end the conversation first. Say you have to go, but don't explain. If need to, say there's a knock at the door, friend just came over, another call. If she initiates hanging up first, use 'I understand, but first... Then thank her and say I have some friends over and I have to go, but I'll call you sometime.

Tell her that you're about to go do something. Say: Well, let's see.... What's your schedule for the next few days? Why don't we get together (when) about (what time). Do you know where the (place) is? Great, if we get along, ten maybe we can go for a bite to eat.... but you know, coffee is a safe bet, this way if you're scary in person. I can say 'oh hey, umm, I just remembered that I have to floss my cat. It's really important and we can call it a night.

When arranging the date, imply consent, give her options like dinner, drinks, movie or bowl, go-kart, skate.

Try to make a day 2 at a mundane place. Somewhere you were going anyhow. Don't make her the event. It's probably best to avoid the common boring dates like coffee and dinner. Furthermore, don't take her to public gatherings unless you have closeness. So unless you're in comfort and built rapport, avoid places like bars, clubs, concerts.

Also confuse her by conditional. Say "We're watching (something) at my house, but make sure you don't laugh when you come in.

To lessen the risk of the chances of flaking, come out with: I bet you're one of those types of girls who flake aren't you? I can tell you say you'll do things and then bail out. Or, Now let me ask this... what are the chances that you're not going to show up tomorrow? Because one of my pet peeves is people that are late and flaky. I can deal with a lot of things, but I'm always on time where I say I'm going to be and I never have an excuse or don't show up. So I just wanted to make sure, because if there's one thing that could end our friendship before it starts, it's flakiness. Once she agrees to not flake, say "Great, it's going to be nice to get to know you better and if nothing else, we can just be friends.

Tell her when you're gonna call to chat. Ask her what's the best time to call. Tell her you'll call her that night when she's getting ready for bed to wish her good night. Use a visualization technique, telling her how you're lying next to her, talking, tucking her in.

Don't call more than 2 times a day every other day. Hang up if it's her answer machine and call her straight back. If you want to leave a message though, say Hey (name), this is (your name), I'm going out with my friends to (place) tonight, let me know if you want to tag along.
Or say 'Hey (name), this is (your name), I just had the most amazing idea, you have to hear this.
When she calls back, say 'I figure out how I could get you to call me back. It totally worked too. hey you won't believe what happened to me yesterday (story).

End conversation by saying 'I'll call you if my plans change, but otherwise I'll see you at (place).

If you're emailing her after n-closing her. Say 'Hey, it was nice meeting you (when)... what are you up to this week? Would you like to join me for a cup of something wonderful and some stimulating conversations. Talk to me.
If she doesn't respond, after a few days, respond with: What? Playing hard to get? Nice. Talk to me.
If you've got an email-close with no number, say 'What's you number and when's a good time to reach you?'

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